i used totally love being a woman.oh the indulgences,the silky,soft,sweet everything feminine,the pink pamper-me-sillies,the men we can manipulate and then cry about with our bestest galpals and then plot hot,sweet revenge,the endless myriad of garments we can try and buy till the cows come home......the list of the pleasures of being the female of the species is neverending (oh plus being members of the women-only club of multiple orgasms!). Yes, on most of the end of the days, i lie back on my bed, sated, for i am, like millions of other females, the sacred temple of human production and i am without a penis. Yet now, i sometimes loathe being a woman because i am prone to being devoured by my own kind. my own sisters in the sisterhood of women. i just reached realization that some women with some women cannot be trusted. i used to think that i can pour out my deepest pheromone-feelings to my fellow sisters and know that their ears would listen, their shoulders would pillow and their heart would feel. now i know that their knives could stab, their hands could grab and my heart could break. why do we have to lie to each other? why lie when the lies don't even matter? why do we have put on false faces with false smiles to only desire to make false friends so we can falsify about each other to others? sure, friction between us women can occur but forgiveness can come easy for we have bigger other problems to deal with like our men, our health, our careers and our lives. why should we give ourselves reason to have nobody to trust? it's atrocious. where i used to look forward to the typical girls' day out where shopping, gorging or just caffeine-style gossip is in order, i now don't look for time-out to make this day happen with anyone of my girlfriends and i try not to be too chummy with many. the happy days of barbie dolls, masak-masak and playing dress-up were over. they stepped back to make place for the reality bites of the human female rat race. i'm happy being what i am now only when i'm with myself, my mother, my little sister, my mom's side of the family and of course, my Azim. Or when i'm doing things that i love doing or doing things to make myself a better person. not even the galpals (whatever that means) whom i have known for so many years are worth my time now. for when the little girls become women, many practice canniballism. they eat their own kind. -Raihan11thJune200311.04am